Happy Halloween!

Thanks for everyone who has written concerning my next two chapters - I think the hold-up at Penguin is that they've just been bought out by a German company and we are consolidating with Random House into one of the largest publishing companies in the world! On top of that, Hurricane Sandy hit New York and shut everything down, so I've had to postpone my talks with my editor and agent. Sorry for the delay - I'm working on getting their permission! in the meantime, I'm off to New Mexico for a real ghost hunt in a very haunted, very old building. It's called the Legal Tender, and my team and I are actually spending the night! On our last ghost hunt at a residence in Ault, Colorado we caught an actual ghost on my infrared camera, which I will post. So...Happy Halloween, stay safe, and I'll check in when everything calms down in New York! XO's, Alane Ferguson P.S. I really, truly appreciate all of your support for Cameryn and Justin! Love to you all!

So Happy You Liked The First Chapter!

I had a bit of trouble with the text in Chapter One (I couldn't get any indentations to show up, which made the paragraphs run into each other. Aack!) I wrote about my margin frustration but those comments somehow mysteriously disappeared upon posting, so sorry it came out in such a chunky block! Anyway, I already had one positive, cheerful response to my setup, which makes my heart sing! As for chapter two, there are legal issues when posting copyrighted material, so I'm not sure if I can sneak that in or not. I'll try to find out. In the meantime, thanks again for the positive feedback. You won't believe what happens to Cameryn in California, mawhahah! (And yes, it has to do with Justin!) XO's, Alane

THE DEAD GIVEAWAY!

Chapter One “Cameryn, open up. I’ve got a surprise for you!” Justin exclaimed as he knocked on Cameryn’s dorm room in a rapid-fire rhythm. “Oh, come on!” Lyric moaned to Cameryn as she raked blue fingernails through her freshly dyed, pumpkin-colored hair. The two of them were nestled into their battered, used loveseat that had been draped with a blanket to hide its preexisting stains. Curled up, with Cameryn’s boney hip pressed against Lyric’s plump one, they’d been preparing to once again watch Cameryn’s audition for a new television reality show called The Dead Giveaway, a forensic program where college students competed for a dazzling money prize. “This is girl’s night and you promised to watch,” Lyric protested. Deliberately aiming the remote, she pressed ‘play’. The television flashed. My name is Cameryn Mahoney and I live in Durango, Colorado, where I am a freshman at Fort Lewis College. It has been my lifelong dream to become a forensic pathologist! Cameryn’s image chirped from the screen. “Cammie!” Justin cried, his voice more insistent. “I know I’m interrupting but you really need to see this.” “I’ll be right there!” she called to her door, which was flimsy enough to allow sound to pass through. “Sorry,” she sighed to Lyric, “it must be important.” Planting her palms on either side of her of her hips, Cameryn lifted herself as she hopped off the loveseat. Lyric rolled her blue, kohl-rimmed eyes. “All right, I will hit ‘pause’ for five minutes, but that’s it.” She aimed the controller at the set so that Cameryn’s image froze in place. “Must I remind you that your best friends needs time, too? And now he’s here,” she swooped the controller through the air, “– again! I understand you guys can’t live without each other but I really wanted to watch the part where you pop off the skull with that screwdriver-thingy. It’s so disturbingly cool.” “I’ll be quick,” Cameryn told her. “I promise.” Although she tried to make her expression serious, for Lyric’s sake, Cameryn couldn’t help but smile, happy that Justin had provided an excuse to get out of yet another viewing. Winning a spot on The Dead Giveaway had filled her dreams during the months since she’d sent in the audition DVD. The problem was she’d never gotten used to seeing her image on film. I look too young, she thought whenever she’d viewed herself in those overlarge pale green, hand-me-down morgue scrubs, paper booties and the stiff, bouffant cap that puffed from her head like a gauzy cloud. With her long hair pulled up, her large, dark eyes appeared almost alien; her voice sounded too thin, too high. Cameryn knew her slight build and short stature made her look much, much younger than her eighteen years, and that would most likely kill her chances at being chosen out of the thousands who had applied. Bang bang bang. Justin’s knocking became more insistent. “Okay, okay, I’m coming!” Cameryn’s bare feet padded against the linoleum squares as she made her way to the one person who knew her almost as well as she knew herself. When she flung it open his dark hair had been dusted in a fine layer of Durango snow that reminded Cameryn of powdered sugar. “You’re out of breath!” she said, brushing the snow off his shoulders. “Sorry,” he huffed, “I ran across the parking lot - took the stairs at -top speed.” He sucked in another gulp of air. “Lyric is not happy you’re here,” she whispered. Rolling onto her toes, she kissed his cold cheek. “I was supposed to be on best friend duty tonight, remember?” “Yeah, I’m seriously thinking of burning my ‘Team Justin’ tee shirt,” Lyric’s singsong voice chimed. “My – apologies - Lyric.” Cameryn laughed as she shook her head. “So…what is it? What’s the 911 emergency?” “Something came today.” His eyes, like lasers, were attuned to her now. It was the way he looked at Cameryn that made every hair on her arms rise up with her gooseflesh. From the inside of his jacket he removed a FedEx envelope, gasping, “They sent it to your old house by mistake – the Hollywood geniuses missed the fact you’re in college now.” His fingers bent the cardboard as he gripped it too tight. “I told your mammaw I would drive it down.” Cameryn froze, staring. “Are you sure it’s from them?” she asked weakly. “It says The Dead Giveaway,” he answered, “So yeah, I’m sure. This is it, Cammie.” In an instant Lyric was at her side. “Oh, my God!” She reached out for the envelope. “What are you waiting for? Let’s open it right now!” “Uh…wow. Okay. Just, give me a second.” Cameryn ran her fingers through her curls and braided them into a long rope, buying mental time. Because inside that cardboard sheath lay the answer to her future, a knowledge both terrifying and exhilarating. It contained the ‘yes’ or the ‘no,’ the ‘go’ or the ‘stay,’ the fame or anonymity. It was everything. Or maybe nothing at all. Standing tall against the doorframe Justin was rigid. Cameryn understood his body language well enough to know he wanted to open that envelope with her alone, without Lyric’s prying eyes, but he was waiting for Cameryn herself to make the decision about what happened next. “Ohhhh,” Lyric breathed out the word. “I get it. I’m not wanted, which is incredibly awkward since this whole thing was my idea in the first place. But, no worries.” Her hand flew up as Cameryn began to protest. “I’ll just go knock on Sara’s door and see if I can score me a Coke. But Cammie, you’ve got to promise to text me as soon as you open it!” “Thanks, Lyric,” Justin told her softly. “For understanding.” “Well, just so you know, my psychic powers are amped to overdrive – and Cammie - you’re going to Hollywood,” she squealed. Lyric stepped around Justin, her pink faux fur slippers whisking against the floor as her terrycloth robe wound between her legs until she vanished around a corner. Cameryn watched from the doorway, chewing her lip. “Aren’t you going to open it?” Justin asked, raising an eyebrow in a dark arch. His breathing had slowed, and he raked back his too-long hair, revealing eyes that were the color of deep water, the blue-green found in the center of a mountain lake. He must have just gotten off of work because he was dressed in his almost-uniform: faded jeans, his green aviator jacket with the collar flipped up, the cowboy boots that had become as worn as a true westerner’s, and a deputy badge hanging from a cord around his neck. A smile lifted the corners of his mouth. “Cameryn Mahoney, you actually look scared. Aren’t you the person who puts her hands inside dead people?” He extended the envelope toward her so that the purple FedEx logo was just inches away, and yet she could not bring herself to take it from him. Her fists remained clenched firmly at her sides. “Come on,” he said, and this time his voice had an edge. “This is my life, too.” Still, she could not move. “Okay, then I’ll do it.” He pinched his fingers and began to pull the thread-like tab. “No - stop!” she cried, so loud it startled a pair of girls ambling by. They glanced at her before moving on, their backpacks bumping together as they walked on. “Sorry, I’m just…freaking out. I mean, I know I had a huge advantage since I work for a medical examiner, but, bottom line, only ten people get chosen for this reality show. Ten. As long as I don’t look, I can believe there’s still a possibility I got picked. So please, let me hope for a minute longer.” “That does not sound like the scientific Cameryn I know,” he replied. “I’m complicated.” She shook her head. “Anyway, it doesn’t matter. Lyric’s wrong. It’s a ‘no’.” She pointed to the envelope. “I can feel it.” He didn’t even try to hide his pleasure as his face erupted into a crooked grin. “If The Dead Giveaway turns you down, then I win.” “And I lose.” Her words hung in the air, and she hated herself for the hurt that flickered behind his eyes. But it only remained a moment before it dipped beneath the waves and his face was impassive once again. “It depends on how you look at it.” As his fingertip brushed against her cheek, she could feel herself leaning in to his touch. And then came his voice, lower now, “Would it really be so bad to stay here with me?” When she hesitated the flicker returned to his eyes. “Look,” he said, “I’m not trying to be selfish, but I don’t want us to be apart, Cammie. Not after everything you and I have lived through. With something this big – like a move and Hollywood - people change. Even if they don’t mean to.” She nodded, because of course she wanted to be close to Justin, safely enrolled in her freshman year at Fort Lewis College, a mere hour from her father and her mammaw. Moving to the city of Durango had been a comfortable transition, a new beginning rooted in old earth. The essence of her small town life had been packed into her Jeep along with her clothes and her laptop and Tupperware filled to the brim with her grandmother’s Irish Lace cookies. Even Dr. Moore had offered her a part-time job as his assistant, a position she’d readily accepted, and she’d stepped into the role without missing a beat. But when Cameryn and Lyric had moved into the Cooper Dorm in July, she’d stood on their cement balcony, wondering at how Durango’s stars exactly mirrored Silverton’s night sky. And why wouldn’t they? The San Juan Mountains cradled Durango in the same way they’d cupped tiny Silverton, and she’d realized that Durango was just a grown up, polished twin of her home town. That sameness had been a comfort, a blanket of continuity in which she’d wrapped herself, cocoon-like and safe. She’d been content with that. Until Lyric had planted the idea of trading the mountains for an ocean. Doctor Moore had been outraged, blaming Lyric for putting such a crazy plan into her head, but Cameryn knew it wasn’t Lyric’s fault. Because the truth was, deep down, a seed had been germinating since she’d moved into the dorm. At night she could almost hear the whispers in her subconscious, fading echoes that hinted there might be more out there in the world, beyond the life she seemed preordained to live. It made her feel guilty. In the eight months since he’d been stabbed, she and Justin had grown together, the two of them becoming all but inseparable. The milestones of their lives had come in quick succession: his returning to his job as deputy of Silverton, her graduation with honors, her move to Fort Lewis, their weekends split between Durango and Silverton. And she’d been happy. So the notion of her walking away, even for three months, was painful because it ripped away at what they’d woven together. And yet…she was only eighteen and had barely been outside the borders of Colorado. That was when it hit her: she’d spent so much time speaking for the dead she wasn’t sure what she had to say for herself. And now an answer was waiting only inches away, clenched in Justin’s hand. Bouncing the soft side of his fist against the doorframe he said, “So open it already.” The flush on his cheeks made Justin’s eyes look electric. “I will. It’s just…I don’t want to do this in the hallway. Come inside.” “But your pop said I couldn’t enter the premises unless –” Before he could finish speaking she grabbed his jacket and pulled him into her dorm room, a small square just large enough for the loveseat and two twin beds, one covered with peace signs and the other, Cameryn’s, made up with a simple denim comforter. “Justin,” she said, “I’m making the decisions now. And it’ll be okay.” Sinking onto her bed, she patted the end and said, “Sit.” He sat. For a moment the stayed that way, with Justin’s hand in hers, until he tossed the envelope to one side and thrust out his arms. Without a thought Cameryn folded herself into him, resting her head against his shoulder as she listened to his heartbeat thump, steady and strong. She felt she could stay there forever, in the twilight of possibilities, but it was Justin who pulled away. “Let’s get it over with,” he said. Reaching past her fingertips he picked up the envelope and placed it in her hands. The return address typed in black ink: The Dead Giveaway, Audition Department, Warner Hollywood Studios, 1041 N. Formosa, Hollywood, CA 90046. With her finger she traced the letters, swallowing hard. Then, grasping the cardboard tab, she pulled hard across the top. There was a ripping sound as she released the plastic thread. Justin was right – there was no point in dragging it out any longer. So it shocked her all the more when he reached out to stay her hand. “Wait,” he said. “Why?” “I want you to kiss me first. For luck.” “Your luck,” she whispered, “or mine?” “Mine.” Leaning close, he tipped his head so that his lips lightly brushed hers; she noticed the taste of peppermint and registered the roughness of his chin. When his lips pressed harder she had a crazy idea, because it seemed as though she could almost feel the pounding of his thoughts, as if the word ‘stay’ pulsed in time with his heartbeat. But she couldn’t let herself be swayed. This was her dream, her rainbow and her pot of gold. Breaking free, she popped opened the envelope and felt for the paper inside. The paper was thick, like linen, and at the top there was a blue and gold seal that made her think of gilded wedding invitations. Dear Ms. Mahoney, it began. As her eyes skimmed the rest of the words her hand flew to her throat as she gave out a cry. “I’m in, Justin!” she screamed, jumping to her feet. “I’m actually in!” Twirling in an arc, the paper flapping in her hand, she felt something inside rise up, a bubble bursting. “I can’t believe it! I made it! Me! They want me! They want me!” If Justin said something in reply she didn’t hear. The colors of the room whirled past her as she spun herself like a whirligig. A single thread of her cocoon was unwinding as she turned again and again until she felt Justin’s hand on her arm, stopping her cold. It took a moment for her eyes to refocus. She could tell that for her sake that he would do his best to pretend he was happy. “Congratulations,” he said woodenly. “I know, right?” she cried as she hugged her sides, unable to contain herself. “Lyric is going to go insane – I’ve got to text her! Doctor Moore hates reality television so he’ll pitch a fit when I tell him, but he’s not the one paying for my college, so -” “That’s not what worries me,” Justin’s voice cut across her. “No,” he put his finger to her lips, “let me say it. Just this one time. Cards on the table.” Cameryn closed her eyes. “Justin, please. Don’t spoil this. This is a good thing. It’s an amazing thing.” His finger slipped past her lips and tucked beneath her chin. With a gently motion, he raised her face to his. “Look at me, Cammie.” Reluctantly, she opened her lids. “What worries me is a number. Three. Three months. That’s a very long time. You and me -” “ – will be fine,” she brushed his objections away as she took a step back. “It’s only three months if they don’t boot me off. Every contestant leaves with money. All of it will go to my student loans. So just…don’t. Don’t make me feel like I’ve let you down. Because this isn’t about you or us. It’s about me and what I want!” It was as if her words had literally slapped him in his face. His expression took on a strange intensity she’d never seen before. Finally, with a quick nod, he leaned down to kiss her on her forehead. What was different from a thousand other kisses was the way he lingered, his lips pressing hard against her skin, cool and dry. “You’re right,” he finally said. “I am?” “Yes. I’ll be rooting for you, Cameryn Mahoney. And I promise, I’ll be waiting.” “Thank you!” Cameryn drew him close as he buried his face in her hair, hugging her so hard she found herself on the tips of bare toes like a ballerina on pointe. She could tell he wanted to say more, but she stopped his lips with another kiss until he gave up and gave in. It wasn’t hard to guess what he was thinking, but she hoped for once he couldn’t see into her mind. Because it wasn’t the thought of leaving Justin or Durango or the mountains that was making her heart beat like mad. It was the thought of her new reality. The reality of The Dead Giveaway.

Last Page!

I'm on my last page of The Dead Giveaway revision! Hurray! When I get back from my Florida trip, I will post the first chapter. YEAH!

Why I Called Myself The Worst Blogger

Someone just asked me what I meant about my comment that I was 'The Worst Blogger' - and to me, it's really clear that I am terrible at reminding myself to check in and write to you guys! My excuses are many, ranging from my family needing me to the tornado that touched down by my home (three miles away) after which came the fires in Colorado (it hailed ash on our house) to the horrible shootings in Aurora (because my friend was murdered, I was very shaken by the violence) to the traveling and the writing of two additional pieces for publication and, above all, my retooling The Dead Giveaway, which I'm told is (blush) the best book yet! I hope so, because I've sweat buckets over its intricate plot-line. And best of all, I'm on the last few pages of my final, final polish! So my apologies for being so lax in sharing my thoughts! (I'm also writing a blog entry every month for The Australian Literary Review - yikes, I'm always at my keyboard!) I have much to share when I come up for air (I'm about to leave for another speaking trip to be held held in Florida, and then I'll be back and stay in Colorado for over a month). I'll be sharing with all of you who are wondering what is next for Cameryn and Justin. The answer is: A LOT! I'll be starting on book six in August, so I've got plenty more in store for those two, with lots of twists and turns. And there is a possibility of the books being turned into a television show, directed by none other the the uber-amazing David Ehrman of The Secret Circle, 24 fame! Keep those candles lit, and I PROMISE I'll try to get better at letting everyone know what's been going on in my life and in the lives of my characters! (Another hint about me - I had the most AMAZING ghost hunt in New Mexico where I captured incredible voices that literally answered my questions. No LIE! I'll try to get everything uploaded when I get back from my trip!) Cheers to all! Alane

I Have Been Naughty, Naughty, Naughty!

I am so sorry for the radio silence - life just got the best of me, along with technical difficulties with my computer. But now for the news - YES, I finished The Dead Giveaway, and it is on my editor's desk as we speak! No news as to when it will be out, but I'll let everyone know as soon as I do. We had a wedding in December (my son Daniel to his lovely bride, Mandy) and a new baby named Emilie born in January to my daughter Kathy and son-in-law DJ, plus I wrote a l-o-o-o-o-n-g piece about the writing process for The Australian Literature Review in addition to blog post which you can find at the following addresses: www.auslit.net;www.writingteennovels.com;www.writingnovelsinaustralia.com
I also wrote an essay for Roaring Brook press and have been speaking all over the country, and am about to leave again in two days. CRAZY BUSY at Chez Ferguson! A bit of fun news between all the madness is that TWO producers are interested in turning these stories into a television series, so we shall see. It's always fun to dream!

My New Year's resolution was to be better at keeping up with my blog, which, as you can see, has been a dismal failure. Here's to doing better as the spring blooms!

An Interesting Forensic Conversation!

This question came to me via an online writer's group called Rockcanyon. It's from an author, and I thought I'd share her query and my reply. (The things I pick up as a mystery writer!) Before reading further, though, I want to give a kind of 'parent advisory' that the material below is real and disturbing. For those who still want to peek into my world, my goal is for you to see the kind of research necessary to write dark characters - what I have to grasp in order to capture their motivations. To create that mindset I have to understand it, which means endless digging and reading! So, if you're not feeling squeamish, here is the author's query and my answer. She was specifically interested in serial killers working as a pair, and asked if that was ever true in real life.

Question: What I'm curious about is how does a serial killer find someone with similar interests? That doesn't seem like something that would come up in normal conversation. And maybe if I'd read your book I'd know this (it's on my list) but how do serial killers appear to others? Do they seem fairly normal, have a normal boring job? Or do they seem pretty freaky? Also, is it possible to use those tendencies in a more appropriate way like being a sniper or writing books about serial killers ;) or something? Also how did you become interested in this and how do you research it? Sorry for all the questions. You don't have to answer them. I'm just curious.

Answer: I know this one since I've researched (and written) so many books involving this subject. For me, it's taken an even more personal tone because my best friend Savannah Anderson was murdered by a serial killer, thus thrusting me on the path to write forensic murder mysteries. So, in a nutshell, most serial killers who team up either have an established relationship (as in the Blanchi/Buono case, where the two men were cousins) or the perpetrators meet in prison, although the internet has unfortunately changed and expanded that dynamic. A third rail is a man enticing a woman to be his accomplice, as in the Jaycee Dugard case where Phillip and Nancy Garrido worked as a team to keep her captive. (There is a theory that at least one more girl had been kidnapped and killed, but I haven't heard the verdict on that, just that they are still looking into it.) Also, the Elizabeth Smart case involved a woman, Wanda Barzee, who cowered beneath Brian Mitchell's reign. Anyway, there is usually a psychological 'master' and a weaker accomplice. The gender of the perpetrators could come down in any combination, but by far the most common is a dominant man with a submissive man, then the man/woman followed by the woman/woman, which is extremely rare. The only case I can think of that might qualify in that instance is the Aileen Wuornos/Tyria Moore case, but the suspicion of Moore being part of the murder spree was never proven. Women serial killers, while real, are very, very unusual.

Last point: a serial killer is a sociopath/psychopath, so they applaud the actions of their peers because they see nothing wrong in what they do, other than the fact they may get caught. To them, they are normal, because they live inside their own heads and they are completely narcissistic with zero feeling for others. They have no empathy. To outsiders their image is usually that of a loner who doesn't quite 'fit in,' but some, like the BTK (Bind Torture Kill) Dennis Rader was a church deacon. He was able to pull off 'normalcy' but only for a short time, so he, as others like him, chose a job that gave him a lot of 'alone time.' I read a book by a forensic psychiatrist who wrote that the sociopath could only keep the veneer up so long before he cracked. (I think it something like six hours, but I'm not sure...) Anyway, there is definitely a profile.

Okay, I'll stop now, because as Dan said, most people don't want to know this stuff. The good news is that the folks you'll meet will be charming, warm friends. You will most likely never, ever cross paths with these crazies, so don't fret. Although I know this stuff, I choose to walk in the rainbows and sunshine. And it's a reminder to carpe diem!

Alane Ferguson

So, dear readers, that is the kind of information I must be fluent in so that I can make up a character like Kyle O'Neil or Dr. Jewel. I not only need to understand the science of forensics, but I must also dig into the minds of those who commit these unspeakable crimes. At the end of the day, though, I go back to what I said at the end of the Rockcanyon post, and that is that I walk in the sun purposely. Yes, the world has darkness, but it also has light. It's where I begin my day and where I end it. So, cherish and love your life. I know I do!

The Forensic Murders

Hi everyone!

I'm knee deep in guts again, busily sawing away at imaginary decedents in my newest book, The Forensic Murders. Or, do you prefer the title The Forensic Academy Murders? I'm on the fence on this one and just wondered what you, my wonderful readers, thought! In between all the writing (I'm still sneaking away to hammer out Dragonfly Eyes on the side) I'm speaking, visiting eight states between now and April to talk about my passion, which is writing! First stop, Omaha, Nebraska, starting February 13th and going through the week. Corn Huskers, here I come!

Oh, and all is right in the world now that Damon from The Vampire Diaries is back with his blue, blue eyes. I'm so team Delena, although I've been intrigued by the newest Caroline/Matt/Tyler twist. I SO dig this series and my other favorites, which include anything at all with ghosts (Supernatural, Ghost Hunters, and the (alas) canceled Medium). I also love Modern Family, Glee, The Middle, and I Survived. On the reading front, I've just reread The Hunger Games (fantastic) and keep crying EVERY time I read the Mockingjay epilogue, which is pretty pathetic since I of course know how it ends. That's the beauty of truly great writing - it never stops moving a reader. Three cheers for Suzanne Collins!

Speaking of writing, I'd better stop blathering and get back to it. Despite being a pacifist, I have to say that in my writing world, there are so many to kill, and yet so little time...

XO's,

Alane Ferguson

South Carolina Asked Me an Interesting Question!

I answered this on a seperate post, but for those who might miss the link, I thought I'd share! Here goes!

Hi Cathy Nelson from SOUTH CAROLINA!

What an interesting question. I've actually never had anyone ask me about censorship before, and I really appreciate you giving me the opportunity to share my views on this touchy topic. First of all, I believe not all published work is suited to all readers. There, I said it - to me it's a simple fact. BUT, having said that, we wade into the murky waters of who decides for whom what is and is not appropriate.

So! I will now weigh in. Remember, this is just my take on the question as an author. (Yikes! I hope when I'm done people won't pelt my house with olives!)

I'll begin with little back-story. I may have mentioned earlier on my blog that ALL are welcome in my home, and those are not empty words. I have had teenagers (girls, mostly - although boys have landed here, too!) who have moved in when things have gotten rough, which has translated into hundreds of hours negotiating sticky areas between teens and adults. My conclusion? Let me just say that there is A LOT MORE GOING ON in the lives of young adults than many parents might care to acknowledge. Yes, there are some protected teens who have never heard a swear word, but they are, sadly, a small minority. Most teens I've encountered have matured beyond their years. (Another fact: I might not like the way they have walked away from their childhoods too soon, but choices are made apart from my pearls of wisdom. I work from what IS, not from what I wish could be). And having said all of that, it is my belief that banning books won't change behavior, not in the slightest.

I mean, isn't that the fear? That a child reading about a certain behavior will suddenly indulge in said behavior themselves? I have never personally witnessed anyone renounce their core beliefs because of some random author's take on life. Quite the contrary. I've found reading is the safest way to explore alternative world views. Personally, I welcome a chance to talk about 'banned' subjects, not to preach as much as to listen. To probe into the decisions of a fictional character and discuss fictional consequences enlightens everyone involved. How much safer is it to talk about imaginary pregnancy than to face the real thing?

Now comes a caveat: Parents know their kids, so I invariability bow to their choices and wisdom when it comes to their offspring. If they deem my books (which some have) as too graphic (for some readers they are) then by all means, censor my books from your family! It's not a problem with me - discretionary reading has my blessing. However, and this is where some people get stuck, the idea of honor goes both ways. Those same parents MUST honor the right of the many to read material they themselves may deem 'unsuitable.' I believe we must not allow individualistic sanctions to put the kibosh on a teacher's/classroom's/librarian's choice of material. For me, the few should not control the rest! We're all about freedom, right? (Man, I feel those olives coming my way...)

Last but not least - one thing life has taught me is that it is impossible to please everyone. Let's not try. To that end, I am a big believer in offering all sorts of books to all kinds of readers - no judgment! I respect their choices...problem solved! Respecting differing points of view is the key.

So! In my humble opinion, let the few choose NOT to read, allow the many to ENJOY, and let the conversations begin!

Want to Learn to Publish Your Own Book?

Hi All!


On September 23rd, my friend will be teaching a webinar about writing for children with the fabulous folks at Writer's Digest. Mary Kole (an agent with Andrea Brown Agency) is trying to get the word out about this webinar (people register, then call in and listen to her give a structured talk, followed by a time for Q&A) so that she will get good attendance for it and make this a worthwhile thing for WD. If it does well, they'll ask her to do it again, and she loves all teaching opportunities. Believe me, Mary is very, very good!

So - for any of you who would like to write, here's your chance to connect with one of the best! Posts/Tweets/blurbs about it now and around September 15th would probably work the best to generate the most interest for Mary (and serve as a reminder for you to tune in as well!)

Here's the link where you can learn more about the webinar. Use this link (or a tinyurl version, etc.) when you blog or Tweet, as it has Mary's referral code on it. Full disclosure: Mary won't get paid per click with this referral code or anything, so it's not like she's getting gravy by asking you to use it, it's just for tracking purposes on WD's end, to see whose publicity worked the best:

http://www.writersdigestshop.com/product/Publish_Your_Childrens_Tween_Teen_Fiction_webinar/?r=mkole

This is a rare opportunity, and I hope all of you who have wanted to break into the field take time to listen to Mary Kole. I know I will!

Alane Ferguson

The Vampire Diaries and More!

Hi Everyone!

Summer's been screaming by and I am, as usual, writing/writing/writing, but since a lot of people have asked me about my favorite books and television shows I thought I'd take just a minute and share! I'm currently working very hard on the next installment in the Forensic Mystery series (I'm having a blast!) entitled THE FORENSIC ACADEMY MURDERS, so I'm back to mining the 'gore' side of my brain. From ghosts to guts - what a transition!

Okay, so when I DO take a break, my first choice is to read, and I can't tell you how much I've enjoyed THE HUNGER GAMES and CATCHING FIRE by Suzanne Collins. If you want some fantastic books to finish off your summer, try those. Her newest one, MOCKINGJAY, will be out next week, and I've already got it pre-ordered.

Also, I have to confess that I am literally counting down the days until THE VAMPIRE DIARIES comes back for Season 2. September 9th can't get here fast enough for me - I'm a total Damon fan and think he is sooooo amazing as a character! So if you haven't seen THE VAMPIRE DIARIES before, I recommend you pop a huge bowl of popcorn and download the episodes from Amazon. Or wait just a few more days for the release of Season 1 on DVD, which I have have also pre-ordered. (I already purchased the downloaded episodes, so you can see how OCD I am about TVD). I promise by the last episode you'll be screaming at your flat-screen, just as I and a big group of friends did during our 'Last Episode' party! I also love GLEE (I am a huge Gleek) and THIRTY ROCK as well as GHOST HUNTERS. My favorite move I've seen lately is THE LIFE BEFORE HER EYES with Uma Thurman, which is an amazing film. Totally worth checking out! And my current favorite workout video is Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred. (Although by the end of it I am calling her names!)

So - those are my favorite things to read/watch when I'm not lost in my Apple creating more trouble for Cameryn Mahoney! I'd love to hear some of your favorites, too. Hope your summer has been as wonderful as mine, and for those of you gearing up for school, have a fantastic start to your best year yet!

XO's from Colorado,

Alane Ferguson

My Friend's Story and My Reply

The following thoughts are really important to me, because they were written by my dear friend Carol Lynch Williams on her blog entitled Throwing Up Words. (She helps writers and those who want to write become better at their craft.) It concerns a topic I'm all too familiar with, and that is facing the pain of letting go of someone you love. I found her insights so compelling that I wanted you to not only see into Carol's heart, but into mine as well. (I've included my reply to her.)

The takeaway is the flip side of the inevitable goodbye, which is holding on and loving our family and our friends hard. So run through the rain, laugh and cry and have fun every day. And above all, remember how very special each and every one of you are!

XO's from Colorado,

Alane Ferguson

From Carol Lynch Williams:

Two funerals to attend this week. Two. The thought of two families suffering actually makes my brain unable to process. I’ve been forgetting things, crying when I least expect it, I’ve had panic attacks, and the sick headache I get when I feel too much stress.

I actually have so much to say, but the thing is, I can’t think of the right way to get the words out. Why? Maybe, maybe, some emotion is private.
Could this is true in writing, too?
I’m not absolutely certain here–but maybe some grief is too sacred or raw or hard to put on the page. So today’s post may be completely off, because this past week has been hard and I may not be seeing things clearly.

A million years ago, when I was writing KELLY AND ME, my first novel, I couldn’t figure out how to end the book. Then I remembered a story from a few years before (this is a flashback within a flashback. Don’t do this in your fiction.). A girl a few years older than I am had lost her 7-year-old son. At the breakfast table. An aneurism. No one saw it coming. He was just there and then gone. (I hate it. I hate it. All these years later I feel sorrow for that young mother.)

Isn’t this like death? We mostly don’t see it coming. Even when we know someone we love is going to die–because of illness–we are still struck with the loss. In a movie I can’t remember the name of, when a mother loses her adult daughter to cancer–and when the daughter’s spirit finally leaves her body, the mother says something like, “I thought it would better, easier, when she was gone. But it isn’t.”

Grief changes us.
Always.
I am not the same today as I was Tuesday morning.

So that means that grief changes our readers, too. When we write grief, we want to connect to our reader. Most everyone has felt sorrow. They may not have known someone who has died, but they have lost things that are important to them–a father or mother through divorce, peace, their place in school, who they thought they were, a bit of themselves because of abuse, their minds–the list goes on and on.

As hard as it is, we have to put grief on the page in a way that makes the emotion feel real. And this is difficult. In MY ANGELICA, when Sage writes a sad scene, she tells the reader of her deep, deep, deep, deep pain. Good writing isn’t telling. It’s sharing. It’s connecting. It’s knowing.

Rushing through an emotional scene–or through an emotion that a whole book centers around–can cheapen what you are writing. The truth is, when we grieve, we’re showing what our loved one meant to us. You’ve read the novel where someone dies and the main character doesn’t miss that person for every word of the book. In fact, they’re moved on rather early. I think one of reasons THE SKY IS EVERYWHERE works is that Jandy Nelson really explores grief. And her characters explore grief. And the reader does, too, with Lennon.

When I was young, my oldest cousin was having an affair with a married man. The man’s wife found my cousin and shot her twice in the chest, killing her in a bar. At the funeral Aunt Carol couldn’t stop crying. It was awful. It was horrible. Aunt Carol screamed and wailed. I stood back in the hot sun, weeping for my aunt. At her sorrow. Someone ran forward, grabbed Aunt Carol and hollered (in her own grief), “Carol, Carol, you’ve got to stop crying.”
“I can’t,” my aunt said. “I can’t.”

And she couldn’t.

Maybe this is the wrong thing to write about all the way around. But I want to remember these two people. And I want you to know something of how I felt to know them. And that the Williams girls are no longer who they were with these losses.

To John I want say, “You made me laugh. And I am sorry that it was so very hard at the end.”

And to Brandon I want to say, “You let people know they mattered. What is better than that?”

To their families I want to say, “I am so sorry. My words cannot even begin to touch the sorrow I know you must be experiencing.”

Because this is real. Sorrow is real. Grief is real. Our readers go through crap and back. And life goes on even when we think it should slow down and just let us take a breath.



From Alane Ferguson:

My newest book, DRAGONFLY EYES, follows the life of a girl named Savannah Anderson who dies unexpectedly, and who, as an earthbound spirit, looks back at the life she lived, wondering what could have been if her time hadn’t been tragically cut short. My forensic mystery series deals with my character Cameryn Mahoney, who dreams of becoming a forensic pathologist in order to give voice to the dead. Death is a theme I circle over and over again because I’ve lived it through the murder of my best friend, Savannah Anderson (I’m using her name in DE as a tribute). She was killed in 1979, and I can honestly say it is from that point that I divide my life: before, and after. Savannah was murdered by a serial killer, and I have never been the same. So to Carol and every other person who wrote such touching posts on this blog, i thank you for putting into words the reason why I write what I write.
The truth is, none of us gets out of here alive.
And while letting go is beyond painful, there is a flip side to the horror, and that is this: We must embrace the life we’ve been given every second of every day, and remind those we love that they made us who we are. Carol, knowing you has changed my life for the better. And because of YOU I am more whole. Your tender heart showed me how to love. (And right now – feel it – I am hugging you fiercely from across the miles!)
I believe grief reminds us to hold on to each other. In THE LOVELY BONES, when Susie’s spirit meets other victims of her killer, she says, “Our heartache poured into one another like water from cup to cup. Each time I told my story, I lost a bit, the smallest drop of pain.”
So we share our sorrow with each other, and then we go on to live and love and never forget
To Carol I want to say, “Those two boys knew you. And that made a difference.”

Crazy/Wonderful Family Surprise!

Hi all!

Sorry I didn't manage to get my ghost pic up yet - that has to be done from my husband's office computer and the gang (all nine) came down for a surprise confab! We're currently heading off to our pool (Gambel Oaks Community pool built for our little subdivision - it's a lot of fun) so as we splash in the Colorado sun picture my ghost orb floating your way on Monday. Now it's back to baking/cooking/splashing for me and the tribe! (We have w-a-a-a-a-a-y too much fun!) :) Come and join us anytime!

XO's,

Alane Ferguson

P.S. My sons-in-law are threatening to throw me in the deep end and dunk me. Boys are always BOYS no matter how old they are!

P.P.S. Maybe I'll hide out here instead!

P.P.S. Don't you think girls are easier? My daughters have never thrown me into the pool. We just sit, crossed-legged on any available bed and gab about everything under the sun. SO much better than getting endless noogies or getting squirted by a hose when my back is turned! BOYS BOYS BOYS! (They are pretty funny, though. It's just been an adjustment because I had four sisters and no brothers.) Okay, here I go. Wish me luck!

P.P.P.S. I'm bringing extra towels, just in case.

P.P.P.P.S. Now I'm stalling...

I'm Back AGAIN!

I just returned from a wonderful but exhausting trip to Utah where I taught a fantastic group of writers how to make their manuscripts market ready. (Those writers rocked it!) Thank you for all your kind comments that arrived while I was on the road - it's so much fun to hear your thoughts about Cameryn and Justin and what should happen to them now that Cameryn's ready to start a new chapter in her life. The next book (spoiler alert) will have Cammie begin her first year in Durango's Ft. Lewis College, so watch out for romantic complications. I'm madly writing my paranormal mystery Dragonfly Eyes and then will switch back to the forensic series, so I'll be stuck behind my desk for a long, long time. That's okay - I love what I do!

My next post, if I can get it to work, will reveal my first official ghost photo I have ever snapped. I spoke in Charleston, South Carolina and at night I went on a cemetery tour to one of the oldest and most haunted graveyards in our country. I got a lot of orbs (I know, I know, most of them are dust) but one of them had a BABY'S face smack in the middle! When I called Bull Dog tours (they are the ones who took me through the cemetery, and I highly recommend them!) the guide explained the grave was that of a mother, father and child who died when their carriage flipped into a river and they tragically drowned. So keep an eye out - I'll try to post it this week.

My new resolution is to keep up with my blog much better that I have been and to let you know what's happening in chez Ferguson. Keep me posted on your lives as well, because I really adore hearing from you all!

XO's forever,

Alane Ferguson

New Article About Me!

I've been traveling so much I've almost forgotten what home feels like - and I'm off one more time until fall!

Once again, thanks to all who have written to me concerning the two new books in the forensic series - kiss kiss kiss to you all! The following is an article detailing a class I'm going to teach. Enjoy!

2010 Writing and Illustrating for Young Readers Conference: Alane Ferguson
As part of our continuing series of 2010 Writing and Illustrating for Young Readers Conference (www.foryoungreaders.com) faculty interviews with interviewer Carol Lynch Williams.
Advanced novel faculty Alane Ferguson was born in Cumberland, Maryland, in 1957. Her mother is children’s author Gloria Skurzynski. Ferguson is the author of many novels and mysteries, including the Edgar Award-winning Show Me The Evidence. Rumor has it that there will be two more books in Alane’s forensic series staring Cameryn Mahoney!
Carol Lynch Williams: Why did you decide to become a writer?
Alane Ferguson: I became a writer because my mother, who is a successful author, showed me that it was possible to actually live out your dreams. (While working in your pajamas with a baby on your lap, no less!) From the time I was twelve I watched the process up close, and I think those observations gave me the key to what makes a writer successful: hard, hard, HARD work and the ability and humility to revise. My personal journey as an author began a bit strangely because I never thought about becoming a writer until I put pencil (literally, it was a yellow notepad) to paper to create a story for my daughter Kristin when she was less than enthusiastic about the arrival of a second child. My mother caught wind of the story and convinced me to send it in to New York for a possible book sale (after a revision, of course). So with great trepidation I popped my story in the mail. Believe it or not, the first place I sent it, bought it, and I’ve been writing ever since!
CLW: Please introduce yourself—but do it as the opening of one of your mystery novels.
AF: Alane Ferguson looked nothing like her sister Joni, whose angularity exuded an almost bird-like quality while Alane seemed softer, rounded both inside and out, like river rocks smoothed by time. Looks, though, could be deceiving: it was Alane who possessed the flair for finding trouble….

CLW: What book has most influenced you?
AF: To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. It was the first time I realized the soul-churning power of the written word.
CLW: You’ve been faculty at this conference many times. Why do you keep coming back?
AF: I keep coming back to this conference because of the talent that attends—I’ve met the most amazing aspiring writers! It is a thrill to become a part of their accomplishments, even if it’s just the smallest link in the writing chain. I get great joy from watching them succeed, and succeed they do!
CLW: What will students learn in your class?
AF: My students will learn how to structure their thoughts, and by that I mean the nuts and bolts of framing their stories in a way that will make their writing ‘pop’ right off the page! It’s actually fun to see the light go on as a writer hones his or her skill. My job is to show authors how to construct their work so their words can flow organically. I call my class a ‘boot camp’ because writing is work, but it in the end they’ll have some nice, strong writing biceps to do the heavy lifting.-
CLW: What is it like to have a mom who is also published?
AF: Having a mom who is also published is cool because she understands both the frustrations and the delights of the writing process. Joyous at my triumphs, Gloria Skurzynski is my most unwavering champion, which can get a bit embarrassing when we’re in a group of other writers and editors. “You think J.K. Rowling can write?” says she, incredulous. “Why, you simply must get a copy of my daughter’s book if you want to see real craftsmanship.” Bear in mind my mother actually said this to an editor who had in fact worked on J.K. Rowling’s books. Hear the internal scream of MOTHER! (And, big surprise, that editor did not ask to see my work.) But seriously, you can’t put a price on that kind of support—she has been invaluable to me as a mentor. The best part is that my mother will not hesitate to tell me when I’ve missed the mark, which is, counter-intuitively, writing gold. I trust her input and adjust accordingly, and my reward has been 32 published books, halfway to my mother’s amazing total of 60!
CLW: What book do we have to look forward to?
AF: My next book is my most personal work of all, a paranormal mystery filled with love and loss and the question of life and its meaning. Dragonfly Eyes is the novel I’m most excited about completing, which should be very, very soon!

I'm Leaving Again!

To all my wonderful fans!

Guess what? It seems your emails have made a difference, because (even though it's not official) it looks as though there will be two more books in this forensic series! It's thanks to readers like you who have made this has happen, and I want to pause for a moment to say an official 'thank you.' Although I'm off (again) to Tampa, Florida, I want to stop and give you-all a virtual hug for keeping this series going. Every one of you is the BEST! Cameryn and Justin will LIVE on! Huzzah!

I LOVE your emails!

Hi Everyone!

I'm so deep into Dragonfly Eyes that when I finally came up for air I got a thrill to read so many emails about Cammie and Justin - this one was especially fun since Sarah asked if I know any 'Justins' in real life. The answer is, YES! My son Daniel is single and looking, so let me know you're a 'Cammie' somewhere in Colorado. (Or Florida, hint hint hint to Mandy!) My son will now officially kill me for posting that! Isn't blogging fun! :)

Seriously, thanks so much for sharing your thoughts about Justin and Cameryn and Dr. Moore and all the characters in my forensic series. They feel real to me, too. And there may be more forensic novels thanks to fans like you and your kind comments on my work. I'll keep you posted on what happens next. And happy Valentine's Day to each and every one of you. Have oodles of chocolate, get lost in a great book, and above all remember how much each and every one of you are loved, especially by ME!

Hello Alane,

I saw your first book on reading list at my library and once I started reading I couldn't put them down until the last page of Dying Breath! I really enjoyed the series and hope that there will be more. Cameryn definitely has a way of getting herself into some crazy situations but they keep you enthralled until the end! I really love that forensic science is sprinkled right in with the romance and mystery! Oh and by the way, if you know any real life 'Justins' send them my way hahaha Just wanted to let you know that I loved the books, and thought I'd add one more fan mail to the pile:)

Your Reader,
Sarah

This Just Illustrates My Point!

I just illustrated my point on how ridiculous I am at this (Kacie isn't here today - darn it!). I thought I'd lost my original I Can't Believe How Long It's Been post, so after searching for over thirty minutes I just rewrote the whole thing. Now there are two. I think this proves I am absolutely pathetic. When Kacie gets here on Monday, she'll have to show me how to delete the post on my Mac. In the meantime, sorry to be so repetitive and redundant. Now you see just how electronically impaired I really am. Embarrassing!

I Can't Believe How Long It's Been!

First of all, it was a shock to my system to see how much time has gone by since I've written. You, though, have been leaving such wonderful comments on my blog that guess what??? I may be writing more about Cammie and Justin thanks to YOU! I've submitted two more proposals for the forensic series, so keep your fingers crossed and those good thought coming! Since I've last written I've traveled all over the country (so much fun!) and been on ever more ghost hunts (scary!. The best part is I've met lots and lots of future authors in high schools and middle schools everywhere. Really, the amount of talent I've seen is breathtaking. I've also been writing my newest book, Dragonfly Eyes, which has been an amazing experience. My life has just been CRAZY! So once I realized I couldn't get everything done (I received almost 2,000 emails during my last week-long trip) I decided to take control of the situation, which means I finally hired an assistant to help me get my schedule/life in order. Her name is Kacie Wheeler and she absolutely ROCKS! So, under her watchful eye, I should get a handle on everything and do much better in keeping up with my blog/emails/speaking schedule/writing. Kacie absolutely laughed at my archaic and chaotic method of keeping track of things - Post It notes that seemed to flutter on their own throughout my office and dates/thoughts scrawled on yellow tablets. She's begun the long, tedious conversion of my paper calendar over to the electronic calendar on my Mac. Wow - with Kacie's help, I finally think there is hope. I should be able to handle things now!

On another note, since it's been so long, let's catch up. In the very few moments of free time I've had I managed to see New Moon (LOVED it!) and Avatar (fantastic - my new favorite) as well as The Lovely Bones, which I felt kinda missed the mark. (Too many special effects, not enough character development.) For the holidays my son and sons'-in-law surprised me with new kitchen granite counter tops that they installed, which was a blast to watch! My boys are so good to me! That was an enormous project which got even bigger: DJ (my son-in-law who is an electrician) thought that as long as they were doing the counter-tops we should put in new lighting, which was an amazing amount of work for him. (The new lights look fantastic!) Then Matt, my other wonderful son-in-law, said as long as he and my son Dan and DJ were doing the new kitchen counter-top, sink and faucet, they should go ahead and tear out the bathroom and install a new faucet and sink and counter-top. Dan had to go back to school in Greeley while DJ had to return to Ft. Collins, which meant Matt got stuck chipping away at my bathroom. Poor guy! So we've had a rotating roster of my kids (and grand-kids) here and a bunch of huge projects going round the clock since Christmas. In the meantime, I've had to travel, and the day I got back from Florida my husband left for China. He got home Thursday and we realized we had been apart over three weeks! Crazy!

I hope this find every one of you happy, well, and ready to write your own stories. Since I'm knee-deep in Dragonfly Eyes I'd like to remind anyone with a paranormal story to please share it with me - it might make its way into my book! Thanks again for your patience and here's to all of our futures. I believe 2010 will be the best one yet!

XO's from Colorado!

I Can't Believe How long It's Been!

Wow - things have been going CRAZY over at my house, and I can't believe it's been so long since I wrote to any of you! First, the good news: it looks like there MAY be more books coming your way in this series! I have spoken with my agent and written two proposals, so cross your fingers and think good thoughts. Cammie and Justin might just be back! Second, I have been traveling pretty much everywhere throughout the country, attending more ghost hunts, taken care of my grand-babies, writing every day, and have pretty pushed myself near the breaking point busy-wise. So! Knowing that this insane schedule just won't do, I hired myself an assistant who has vowed to help me shatter this blockade of emails (2000 arrived in the last week while I was gone. She's instructed me to convert all my information onto my Mac (seems obvious, but I've been relying on post-its that I always lose) and generally get things on track. Her name is Kacie Wheeler and she is amazing. So you should be hearing much more from me in the future. I've vowed to get my life pulled together, and Kacie is just the person to help me dig through this mound of work. She will be my game-changer!

On a separate note, I ADORED New Moon and I went crazy for Avatar, so I did manage to squeeze in some fun things besides work. My new book Dragonfly Eyes is really coming along as well. Remember, please post any of your real life ghost stories so I can incorporate them into my book. And last but not least, thanks to all of your for your encouraging and kind comments. My editors have looked at what you've written, and it all counts. So THANK YOU!

XO's from Colorado!

Ghost Hunting!

A HUGE thanks to all of you who have written and supported The Dying Breath - everyone's been excited (my agent and editor) and there may be more. I'd also like to ask everyone to do me an incredible favor - pleasepleaseplease go to Amazon and Barnes & Noble and write your positive comments on their review sites. It could really make the difference on going forward with this series!

Right now I just have to share where I've been and what I've been up to, which is ghost hunting in the Stanley Hotel (inspiration for Stephen King's The Shining) with Grant and Kris, Amy and Britt. (Alas, Jason was home sick with the Swine flu.) It was totally awesome and I learned a lot that I will use in my new book Dragonfly Eyes. I'll blend the paranormal along with the forensic science in that series, so there should be something for everyone! As always it's hard to squeeze everything in - I'll be leaving for Florida this Sunday and will keep traveling right up until Christmas. I'll try to get some pictures up of me on the hunt with all my ghostly gadgets. I crept through the tunnels beneath the hotel and did EVP and K2 sessions, which at one point got a bit creepy. The things I do for research!

Again, thanks so much for your amazing feedback on The Dying Breath. You all ROCK!

The Dying Breath is Out!

I JUST got back from a fabulous speaking trip to South Carolina, so I missed the chance to post on the big day, October 15th. But The Dying Breath is finally and officially out, and the reviewers have said it's the best one yet! I'm completely pumped and happy that you can finally discover what happens to Cameryn, Justin and Kyle. Here's just one of the many fantastic emails I've received since TDB's debut:

Dear Alane,

First of all, I have to say that The Dying Breath was one of the BEST books I have ever read! It was addicting from the first page to the very end and it made me happy and sad when I reached the end. The part that I loved the best was all the action at the end. I was actually wondering where you get all your ideas for your books and if there is going to be more of Forensic Mysteries. I hope there is because you have written one of the best book series I have ever read!

Jessica Soria

If you the fans continue to want more in this series I will happily take the forensics to the next level - Cameryn will attend Ft. Lewis college in Durango and solve even more intricate cases with Dr. Moore. So! Pass the word! And thanks again to all who have pre-ordered the book and to you who have supported me and this series from its inception. I really love you all!

Inspirational!

Great news - The Forensic Mystery Series has just been sold to Amazon's Audiobooks! It will be exciting to hear my words read out loud (I hope it's someone with a British accent, because I could listen to a man/woman with a British accent all day!) I'll keep you posted on the dates. Yeah!
I also wanted to share the following email with you because it makes me happy when my work encourages a reader to pursue her/his own dreams. Rachel feels like a lot of people, because forensics can be perceived as 'grim' and those who choose it 'ghoulish.' While I admit it is a difficult profession, it is, in my opinion, an extremely noble one. Who else will speak for those who have been silenced? So, to Rachel and everyone else who is walking their own path, I say, kudos.

Here is RAchel's email:


Dear Alane, I have just recently discovered your "Christopher Killer" series, and the books have totally blown me away. I am a junior in high school and I have already decided that I am going to be a medical examiner when I am older. I have always been very intrigued by forensic pathology, because there is something about being able to speak for those who can no longer speak for themselves that draws me in. Up until I read "The Christopher Killer" a couple weeks ago, I felt as if I was just a crazy person who wanted to cut up dead people for the rest of my life, and that's what I felt others thought of me. After reading these books, I have found the confidence inside myself to be proud of what I want to do with the rest of my life. Also, I am VERY excited about the release of your newest book, "The Dying Breath." You can bet I will be there when it is released :) Anyways, please keep writing more amazing books! It is hard to find good, quality, interesting forensic novels these days, but you have definitely hit the nail on the head!
Thank you so much for writing these books and inspiring me even more.

Rachel Lee

Thanks, Rachel, and hugs to everyone who shares their thoughts and hearts with me. I really love to hear your thoughts!

The Blue Screen of Death!

Here is another fact about me - technology and I do not get along. I don't know why, but I've gone through FOUR hard drives, the last one having melted not only itself but the thumb drive as well. So two + weeks ago my computer froze up yet again while I was working (between running over to my daughter's to help with baby Megan) and I could not believe I lost a whole day's work. Still, I was relieved that I at least had an external hard drive that automatically backed up every night, something I bought the last time disaster struck. But still - a whole day of work is a lot to lose, and I was literally pacing while my husband tackled my computer. As I walked and chewed my nails I kept muttering "at least I have my external backup, at lest I have my external backup." Ron told me I was making him nervous and I needed to go upstairs. About an hour later my husband sat next to me and took my hand. "You just got The Blue Screen of Death. And now is not a time for recriminations," says he. I dug my fingers into my legs as I asked for clarification, which went something like, "Uhhh, The Blue Screen of Death means your computer is fried, and I, um, installed the external hard drive backup system incorrectly, sooo, it never saved anything." (I'm still married, surprisingly.) I took my computer to Best Buy, where I had my warranty, only to learn the problem has a name - 'catastrophic hard drive failure,' which translates to 'You are Screwed.' I've got nothing at the moment except a shiny new Mac that I'm now learning to navigate. The kicker to this perfect storm is that my email previously failed and my husband went into the ethernet where my emails were backed up, except the sheer volume had swollen to 45,000 in the past year, which rendered that safety net basically inoperable. So he wiped them off - poof! However, he did not reinstall the program. (Did I mention I'm still married?) The Geek Squad claims that they cannot retrieve my emails off my hard drive by law, which left me with with NO contact information, NO address book, and NO correspondence for all the speaking I'm booked for but have NO idea of the details.

SO! If I have missed any of your emails it's because I didn't have a computer for awhile, and I'm really sorry. I will say one thing, though, and that is holding a new life really keeps things in perspective. Although the computer crash has been incredibly frustrating, there is nothing like a baby to bring back the joy. I'm still smiling! Your good thoughts have been a real boost, too. And October (and The Dying Breath release)is right around the coroner! Good time are comming!

Some Pictures!

Hi All!

I've just posted a couple of pictures of the new baby (aren't grandmas relentless?) in case you'd like to see Megan & company! Just go to my web page at www.alaneferguson.com and hit the 'About Alane' tab, then follow the link that says 'Want to See Some Candid Photos' and there she is! So now my total is four - three granddaughters and one grandson! I LOVE it!

Welcome Megan Alane!

Huzzah - she's here!!! Our little grand baby Megan Alane Gloria Ledesma arrived July 28th at 1:03 p.m., weighing in at 7 lbs. 2oz. and measuring 19 1/4 inches long. She's got a button nose and dark hair (her siblings started out as blonds, so who knows what we'll get in the end) and we couldn't be happier with our sweet addition! After a week of helping (and no sleep) I'm back, sharing the good news with you and writing once again. Thanks to everyone for your much-needed prayers and good thoughts you sent our way - we're exhausted but happy and Megan is a joy. I'll be posting pictures shortly!

More when I get some sleep!

We're Still Hanging In!

Thanks for all of your warm thoughts concerning baby - we're still hanging in, trying to squeeze out every last day. I'll let you know when the wee one arrives, but we're officially 'out of the woods' now and the baby should be fine. In the meantime, I was able to sneak away and watch the new Harry Potter movie, which I found fantastic! I highly recommend it to anyone who hasn't seen it yet. Of course, on the way out I spied a poster for New Moon, which was inspiring! I'm all ready counting down until November....

The Dying Breath will be out in two months (can you believe it!) and I'm ready for all of you to read it so you can find out what happens to Cameryn and Justin! I just completed a really interesting interview for an amazing woman named Deborah Krueger Hipes that focused on The Circle of Blood. In addition to teaching a class at Indiana University/Purdue University Indianapolis Campus, Deborah presents a seminar for the Bureau of Education & Research where she has recommended my YA novels. We had a teleconference where her students asked me questions. I guess it's startling when I really start to count how many brushes I've had with death, and I thought once again about the impact it's had on me. In the end, I really feel you've got to find happiness in all the good/great things you're given, which, if you really think about it, will be a LOT! The funny thing is that I really am not in the least bit morose, which is what people expect when they find out I write forensic mysteries. I wanted to share some of Deborah's kind words she emailed to me afterward:
Hi Lanie,

It was soooo much fun talking to you yesterday. You were delightful. My teachers were mesmerized, & still talking about you fifteen minutes after the call. You may have had lots of episodes with death in your life, but you are truly FILLED with LIFE. Thanks for talking with us--especially during a really stressful time with another new life in your life! I hope everything goes well for your daughter & her new baby. (Please let me know what you get.) :~)


So - my thought for today, as I await another major addition to my family - is to smile :) and remember how fleeting is our time on planet earth. Make it count - give someone you love a hug today! You won't be sorry!

Say a Prayer!

I just got back from the hospital - my daughter Kristin is trying to have her third baby w-a-a-a-a-y too early, and so she, her husband Matt and I were in the Emergency Labor Room all night! Right now all is well, but I've been watching her other two adorable but high-energy kiddos today after that all-nighter which means at this moment my eyes are getting bleary from lack of sleep. So! Please send your good thoughts her way, because we need to keep the new little one cookin' for at least two more weeks!

In the meantime, we had a tornado warning yesterday and another one today, so nothing is calm in Elizabeth. Although...I must say it's the perfect weather to curl up with a good book, and I'm reading one that is amazing! It's called THIS IS WHAT I DID by Ann Dee Ellis. What a fantastic writer! Oh, and be sure to check out THE CHOSEN ONE by the brilliant Carol Lynch Williams. I read it before it was published and I COULD NOT put it down. So I'll grab a book and head for bed. Cheers!

Alane Ferguson

So Sorry for the Drought!

Hello to everyone!

So I got an email from my new friend David who said, and I quote: "I'm such a fan. But I have to be honest. You suck at updating your blog. April 26th? That was like TWO WHOLE MONTHS AGO." Me again: That was sooooo embarrassing because it's been sooooo true! My excuses are that I was sick, which you knew, and then I rose from my deathbed to travel again and again in back-to-back trips. When I finally came home my family arrived from all over (five actually stayed with me, but I fed 15 at one point, along with four LARGE dogs who stayed in my home with their masters) and then I was off again (some of my family was still at my house when I hit the airport) to teach the most AMAZING class of writers in Utah, where I met David, who took a picture of me at the conference and used some sort of Power Point drawing-thing to turn me into a bunny! (Don't even ask!) And then we had that humongous tornado on Monday (anyone see it on the news? That was Elizabeth, Colorado, where I live, and it was all over the media, including CNN. Didn't hit my house but what a storm!) And then my daughter Kristin went into premature labor (she's due August 8th) so I've been helping out there. Whew! Okay, enough excuses, keeping up with my blog just got away from me. But I vow (are you listening, David?) to do better in the future!

I got another amazing email from Jessica. She wrote:

Dear Alane Ferguson,

THANK YOU for your amazing novels in the Christopher Killer series. I can't wait for the next one to come out this fall. I never truly got in to watching crime TV shows, but when a friend recommended that I read this series, and then my entire book club started recommending that I read them, I had to pick them up. I'll be honest, I'm a girl who faints at the sight of blood, even my own, but your books truly made me interested about forensic science. Never, while reading your book, did I feel squeamish, but rather enthralled and drawn closer. It's an odd feeling, when you find yourself lost in the world of something you never looked at closely before, but I loved it.

I was wondering if you were going to do a tour when "The Dying Breath" comes out, and if there would be any chance for you to come anywhere near where I live, outside of Chicago IL, so that I could get your autograph and meet you in person. That would be so cool. And if there will be no such tour, or no chance of me meeting you, I would gladly pay postage for you to send me your autograph in the mail, if that would be something you would do. I would love to have your signature!

Oh, by the way, I'm highly frustrated with the end of "Circle of Blood" and the first chapter of "The Dying Breath". Kyle! Oh my gosh! I was freaking out, and I need MORE! As I said, I can't wait for the next book. They are written so well, and greatly detailed and knowledgeable.

Thank you for being such a great author and making me want more,
Jessica


What I loved about her email is that, believe it or not, a part of me is squeamish, too. I am a mass of contradictions! But the way Jessica felt about being 'drawn in' is exactly how I felt when I got to peek into that fascinating forensic world. All those shiny instruments, all of that blood...a body really is a puzzle that needs to be solved. But I have to admit when I come home after an autopsy I want to stay in the shower a long,long time! The smell is the hardest part...

One other thing - Jessica asked about a book tour, and those can get started by fans like you emailing Penguin with a request to have me come to your area. If there's enough interest then I'm all over it!

Also, I'm happy to send out book plates to any of you who might want them. Just email me at aferguson@alaneferguson.com with your address and which books you have and I'll pop the bookplates right in the mail. You can stick them in the front of your books so it's autographed!

Lastly, I would like to thank everyone who wrote to me on the blog while I was gone. It means a lot to me that you're so patient. I'm home now for awhile and I'm crossing my fingers that ABC, who has expressed interest in developing my forensic books into a series, options the books. Keep those fingers crossed and say those prayers for me!

Hugs-from-tornado-alley,

Alane Ferguson

I Love Your Emails!

Well, it looks like I'm going to live - huzzah! I've had a particularly bad smack-down from pneumonia, which meant I had to cancel one of my trips to Florida. But I'm on my feet enough to fly out tomorrow (still coughing, but standing!) and my hair once again will frizz in the Florida moisture! In the meantime, I got one of my favorite emails that I just had to share:

Dear Alane Ferguson,

My name is Lydia and I have just finished reading your amazing series the Christopher Killer and the other ones in it and was wondering if you could answer some of my questions about the books.
First of all, I would like to say your series is quite superb and has made my top favorite books, which is saying a lot because I read a ton of books. You use amazing imagery. Way better than the Twilight series and Harry Potter series combined.
My questions are approximately how long does it take you just to research all of the facts needed in your books? Where do you get your inspiration from? What gave you the idea to write this series? Why did you have to leave me hanging at the end of The Circle of Blood? Why, Why, Why!? How many books will been in this series? Your series is way more addicting then Twilight. If you have this answers please e-mail me. I understand if you don't reply and thank you for your time.

Sincerely,
Lydia A most addicted fan of yours(does that make since I hope it does)

It takes me quite a long time and a lot of research to complete a book, which should take six months but in actuality takes up to a year - ask my editor if I'm always late! My inspiration comes from so many places, but I think in the end it just boils down to the fact that I just love making up my own world! And any of you can do the same thing, because I've seen superb writing in your messages! One of the reasons I shared this email is that I was just so honored by Lydia's comparison between my work and the work of my favorite writers, so THANK YOU LYDIA! I will share more emails and answers upon my return (I'll fly in this Friday) but I wanted to thank all of you who kept me in your thoughts and prayers during this nasty illness. Please keep it up, because this will be a tough week when my lung is still crackling and wheezing....hope I make it!

Hugs fro me to you!

Wisconsin ROCKS and Now I'm Off to Florida!

I LOVED my time in Wisconsin - I was taken to a creepy cemetery where I heard some great ghost stories (I traveled from Madison to Manitowoc) that might make their way into my new book. At one point I totally spooked the principal from Wilson Junior High when a reading specialist named Marcia Morgan (she is a new BFF!) took us to a tombstone statue that supposedly looked like a demon at night. Even though it was only beginning to turn to dusk I could see how strange the face looked above the grave, and imagined how enhanced it would have looked if viewed in the dark by way of a flashlight, which was, according to Marcia, the only proper way to view the face. It was simply fantastic! Upon my return I spoke in Colorado, which was followed by a family reunion here in Elizabeth where the whole clan gathered to celebrate Easter and baby Katelin's first birthday. My ADORABLE grand baby Katelin brought the flu along with her and passed it to everyone. The family is currently falling one by one, including my daughter Kristin, my son-in-law DJ, my son Danny, my husband Ron, and now I'm feeling a bit yucky as well. Must stay strong for my trip to Orlando, which begins this Sunday! (Please send good non-flu thoughts my way!) Anyway, while I am still upright I wanted to share a wonderful email I received from Dr. Judy Lasher, who thought I nailed Kyle's psychological problems to the tee. Here's what she had to say:

I am new to your website so I did not know about your friend, and, I am deeply sorry. However, those wounds change us and motivate us in numerous ways. It is interesting that you never stop asking the “why” question when you have acknowledged the mind of the (Axis II) personality disordered person has the absence of conscience. But, in reality…we ask why because it was too close to home. We can understand the dynamics of certain personalities but it just flies out the window when it directly touches us.

Dr. Lasher is exactly right, not only about the kind of mind that would allow a murderer to kill, but the endless 'why' questions we who have lost loved ones ask ourselves. You'll see these issues hit head-on in The Dying Breath. I'm so pumped for that book to come out! Also, it's been interesting writing Dragonfly Eyes, since I use my friend Savannah's name and I picture what she would think from the other side. One thing facing death makes you remember, and that is to enjoy every day we are given! One thing that makes me happy is hearing from YOU! This email just arrived while I was writing this post:

Hi.....My name is Micera, and I am 17 years old...

I just finished your book, The Christopher Killer, and the moment I picked it up at my school library, I just had to read it....What attracted me to this book was that I love forensics, and I always wanted to be something that involves the dead...Once I started reading, I couldn't put it down!!!.....It only took me two days to read it, and I'm looking forward to your other books....

Thank you for creating this fabulous book, and I'm sure your other books is a great success...

I am your biggest fan!!!!! And I am so excited to get my hands on the next book I read of yours...

God bless, and keep writing.

When you all take a moment to write me or another author, remember that you are spreading some serious joy! Thanks so much, keep smiling, send on the good thoughts and ghost stories, and I'll see you in the Sunshine State!

Twilight is Out and I'm Back!

Hi all!

Okay, most important news first - the Twilight movie made it to the stores - whoo hoo - and I bought the three disc set with all the goodies! So far I have watched the movie, the movie WITH commentary, and all the deleted scenes and making-of etc. while munching happily on tubs of popcorn. (Elliptical machine here I come!) Life is good! But the thing I found most amazing about the commentary was the way Robert Pattinson dissed himself throughout, which I found fascinating. I mean, he is one of the most gorgeous human beings on the planet and he kept finding fault with his looks, which goes to show how delicate self image can be. Robert Pattinson (he plays Edward, for those of you who haven't seen the movie) hates his hands and thinks he's not buff enough and on and on and on - maybe we ALL feel like that and just don't say it out loud. Anyway, despite the cheesy Twilight special effects (painful tree-climbing and running) I really loved the movie, especially the sound track. My favorite scene (well, apart from the first kiss and the dance at the end) was the baseball game, which is funny since I'm not a huge fan of human baseball. SO much fun in the movie! But check out Rosalie's hair - it goes from curly to frizzy and back to curly throughout the game, which is the kind of detail obsessive fans like me pick out after the eleventh time through. It's just that when I get into something, I REALLY get into it!

Now, for my personal news: last week I spoke in Missouri and had a blast meeting kids and teachers and talking about my books - I even showed some real autopsy footage that proves how truly difficult the job of a forensic pathologist can be, especially when it comes to how gruesome it gets when one opens up human remains. I've come to the conclusion that those who dedicate their lives to this field are amazing, selfless people. As for me, I got too emotional during the autopsies that I witnessed because I kept thinking about the fact that these people had lives and families who loved them and now they were just...gone. I worried about those who were left behind. Every one of the coroners and pathologists I talked to told me they had to learn to detach, something I'm not good at. In real life I'm far too sensitive. Forensic pathologists are problem solvers, and I'm grateful that they tell the stories for those who can't. We need them, and it's been a privilege to write about their lives.

On a separate note, I want to thank those of you who have written to me about their first-hand experiences with ghosts - I've read some AWESOME stories, so kudos! I really appreciate your sharing. I will be using several accounts in Dragonfly Eyes. Please, keep them coming!

Finally, I am thrilled to announce I have been nominated for the2010 Abraham Lincoln Illinois H.S. Book Award! Thank you Illinois!

Now I'll get back to work! I'll be speaking the first week of April in Wisconsin, and then it's three separate trips to Florida. Sunshine state, here I come! And get ready for The Dying Breath, because time is flying by. It'll be in your hands before you know it!

Fun Emails!

Hi Everyone!

It is simply gorgeous in Colorado - very sunny and warm, like a breath of early spring! I wanted to share some really fun emails I've received from friends like you and answer some of the questions on this message board as well as individually. So, here goes - my first attempt at cut and paste!

Kitty said:

haha...i am soooooooooooo happy that you replied...i actually thought you wouldn't..but you did....i already read the first chapter and i was jumping in my chair sooo much my mom screamed at me from downstairs to stop...lol...nowadays when people ask me if i like "like" anybody...i almost say Justin and Kyle...haha...Justin because of...well...how he cares for her is soo heart-warming for me...Kyle because i am CRAZY for mysterious boys...i love the way he posed as Jo Ann and then sent that creepy message at the end...i almost screamed in terror (and in happiness) that he had returned...it made me think something was bound to happen in their awkward relationship...aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa....i also loved the creepy note(well body) he left her...although i was creeped..i LOVED it...Cammie is now my actual role-model...i try to act the same way she does...and i also have a blackberry phone...i know...i know...i sound childish...but Cammie, Justin, and Kyle are soooo realsitic to me..i even dreamed of them...can you tell me more about Cammie? i know alot but i really want to know her like one of my best friends...thank you soo much for replying!! and Good Luck on The Dying Breath...i am trying to get it pre-ordered...but uhmm...it's not working lol....well i gotta go and work on my homework soo bye for now!!!

This is from Abby:

Hi, my name is Abby, and I am from NH. I’m in 8th grade, and I absolutely love your books!! My cousin had recommended them to me, and she is really into CSI, so I read The Christopher Killer. It was a brilliant story, and I wanted my dad to read them. He is about to read The Angel of Death. Now I’m waiting for my mom and eventually my younger sister to read them!! Today I just finished The Circle of Blood and I CANNOT wait until The Dying Breath! You are such a great author, and I love how unpredictable the stories are, I never know what will happen next. Right now I am working on an essay for my language arts class, and it has to be about a character in the book you pick. I will be writing mine about Cameryn. I think she is a great character who is very strong and responsible. I just wanted to let you know how much I love your mysteries, so keep writing as awesome as you are!!!!

And Debbie wrote:

I really enjoyed The Angel of Death and The Circle of Blood. I am a middle school librarian, as well as an avid young adult literature, and I think that these will be a hit with my students! I am eagerly waiting for Dying Breath in the fall!

Sincerely,
Debbie

And another kind one that is already posted on my blog:

Bravo! Cannot wait to read on... The cover is fabulous. At 46, I am a huge fan of the series! Cannot wait for more. As a bookseller at the local mall, I am so enthusiastic about recommending your books to my young adult readers and their mothers!



Now it's me again - it's sooo much fun to realize that people of all ages have discovered the weird world of forensics through my books! Thanks to all who have written! Oh, and I must tell Kitty that in real life it is imperitive that she RUN from guys like Kyle, (trust me on this!) although it is perfectly fine to enjoy reading about those bad, bad boys. What would life be without them? I'm also very grateful to have been included on the South Carolina Teen Read Book List. I've been invited to speak there, as well as Tennessee, Missouri, Utah, Wisconsin, and three times in sunny Florida. If you live in any of these areas, I'll see you very soon. In the meantime, it's back to ghosts for me!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Thank You From My Heart!

You will never, ever understand how much your kind comments have meant to me - first chapters are so hard to do and I am just buzzing over here, relieved/thrilled that you like it! Bless each and every one of you for your generous, sweet, uplifting words. Seriously, I'm just so happy! And if you think chapter one is scary, just wait. The Dying Breath really is a WILD ride from start to finish! So far, those who have read it have told me without a doubt it is their favorite. Watch out for Justin! REALLY watch out for Kyle. A storm is coming and you need to be ready!

LOVE to each and every one of you,

Alane Ferguson

Chapter One of The Dying Breath!

Well, you asked for it and I just got clearance to post an exerpt of The Dying Breath! I hope you all like it! This comes with hugs and kisses from me to you!

Chapter One

“There’s no way I can let you in that house with the remains,” Sheriff Jacobs told Cameryn. A small man, the sheriff leaned his hip against the porch’s wooden railing, his expression obscured by the sun’s reflection on his glasses. He took a long drag from his cigarette, sending a plume into the frigid February air, then lazily flicked the ashes onto the snow-encrusted bushes below. “Sorry to smoke in front of you—I wouldn’t do it ‘cept it cuts the smell. There’s not another odor in this world like the stench of a decaying human and I, for one, can’t stand it.” Another drag, and then, “And I’d appreciate it if you stopped rolling your eyes at me, Cameryn Mahoney. I know you’re assistant to the coroner, but you’re only seventeen and your father, the real coroner, ain’t here yet, which means I’m the one in charge. We’re not breaking in until Pat gets here.”
“Except you’re not listening. We don’t have to break anything!” Cameryn protested.
The sheriff cut her off. “Dream on. Leather Ed keeps this dump locked up tighter than a drum.” Jacobs waved his cigarette toward the metal bars that wept trails of orange rust onto the home’s weathered siding. “Bars on the windows, deadbolts on the doors, all to protect stuff that wasn’t even worth stealing. Soon as my deputy gets here he’ll bust us in, and then we’ll go inside, together, to see what’s what. Afterwards you can take your pictures of the dead.” He pinched the cigarette between his thumb and forefinger, taking a long drag. “You know, I’ll never understand why a pretty girl like you….” His voice trailed off, but Cameryn no longer listened because her mind was focused on other things.
The answer, she knew, was in the door itself. She peeled off her thick coat and dropped it next to a pile of trash Leather Ed had stacked against the siding, a stack that had grown to a height of almost three feet. Squatting, she examined the dog-door flap, darkened to black from years of grime. Leather Ed owned an emaciated German shepherd which had already been removed by a worried neighbor, a man who had called the police, who had, in turn, called the coroner’s office, who’d sent a text to her. Death had its protocol.
Studying the frame around the dog door, Cameryn mentally took its dimensions; then with a tentative swipe she kicked the weathered plastic. The panel swung back and forth like a metronome, revealing a patch of dirty floor and a crumpled edge of a paper plate. Difficult, yes, but she could clear it, with or without Jacobs’ consent. She got on her knees and began to back in feet first, her hair falling into her face in dark curtain. It was a tight fit. As she moved she tried not to picture the filthy linoleum her jeans would scrape against or notice the fresh wave of odor that wound around her like a pungent scarf. The metal lip of the dog door dug into her backside and she was just tilting onto her hip when she felt hands yanking her beneath her armpits. The sheriff pulled her to her feet with so much force she almost cried out.
“Are you crazy?” Jacob’s expression was the same one everyone in Silverton wore whenever they looked at her now. Lines of worry, and inside that, real fear. “Your father would skin me alive if I let you out of my sight.” His hand sliced through the air as he talked over her protests, “No, Cameryn, not even for a single moment. No, no, no!”
“Come on, I only want to go a few feet inside so I can unlock the door—that’s all!” she cried. “Let me do my job, Sheriff. I’m not an infant.”
“No, what you are is a target.” Leaning close, Jacobs dropped his cigarette onto the porch. With a slow, sure motion, he ground the stub beneath the heel of his boot. “No one knows what’s in that house. Probably nothing but the body of the town eccentric. But the fact is, Kyle O’Neil’s got you in his crosshairs and right now you’re on my watch. I’m not taking any chances.” He paused for a moment, for effect, Cameryn guessed, but she wouldn’t let him see how his words had hit home. The verbal punch to her heart—she had learned to take the hit without flinching where outsiders could see. She forced her eyes to meet his, which were cold and wintry gray. Raising her chin, she said, “That’s ridiculous. Kyle’s gone.”
“How do you know that?” Jacobs tapped his finger to his temple. “Huh? Use that famous brain of yours. There ain’t no body.”
“Yes, but—”
“But nothing. I know everyone in town is saying that psycho got lost in those mountains and froze hisself to death, and I hope to the good Lord they’re right. Maybe come spring we find his sorry carcass frozen in some creek. But you need to think about this: if that boy had enough smarts to kill his teacher, he’s smart enough to keep hisself alive, even in February.” He jabbed his forefinger at Cameryn. “Until we find him, I say you’re in danger, which means you’re staying right here by my side. Understand?”
There was nothing to say. Looking past him, she focused on a hermit thrush perched on the rim of a toppled bird feeder, its claws as fine as thread. It was a trick she’d begun to master, a mental dodge she used when people insisted on pressing themselves into her life: stare at something else, concentrate on the detail of the thing. Let their words pass over like water.
“I’ll take your silence as a ‘yes’,” Jacobs told her. “And now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna call my deputy. He shoulda been here by now.” Jacobs stomped down the rickety porch steps and turned his back toward her, one finger screwed into his ear while he pressed the phone into the other.
Cameryn was aware of the cold creeping through her too-thin shirt, grateful that it cooled the heat of her frustration. Overhead, above the peak of Molar Mountain, the palest moon shimmered, a golden coin floating in a blue water sky. In the past, her beloved mountains had felt protective. Now, they’d become walls. Walls that echoed the word that had come to define her.
Target.
It was the perfect word as to what she’d become. She was no longer Cameryn Mahoney, senior at Silverton High, straight-A student, science geek and forensic guru. When she walked the hallways at school whispers followed, marking her new identity: The Victim. The hunted. Prey.
She had almost loved him once. Kyle On’Neil, the boy who, with terrible precision, had tried to kill her. Before the police arrived he’d vanished into the mountains, and Cameryn had believed the F.B.I. when they announced he’d been spotted in Mexico. And yet, as Silverton glittered beneath strings of Christmas lights, Cameryn received a message on her bedroom computer. I see you. Come out and play. Move your curtain and look out. By the trees. I’m waiting.
She’d pulled back her curtain. There, illuminated by moonlight, stood Kyle. Even in the half-light she’d recognized his muscled frame, his square jaw, the yellow hair glinting like dandelion fluff, his legs thick as tree trunks rooted into the ground. His face had been too deep in shadow for her to make out his eyes, but she could see the curve of the mouth. He was smiling.
Kyle raised his hand, touching his heart with his fist before extending his open palm toward her. Horror flooded her as he faded back into a stand of pine. It was only then she realized she was screaming.
And once again Kyle O’Neil had vanished. It was the second time he’d threatened her life. This time, though, the town’s reaction had been different. Aware that she’d been twice menaced, Silverton had pulled together for Cameryn’s protection, and she felt as though she were an insect caught in a web. It was as if she would suffocate in the silk cocoon of good intentions.
Now she watched as Sheriff Jacobs paced across Leather Ed’s yard, his boots cleaving snow. “Yes, Justin, Cammie’s with me.” He stole a glance at Cameryn before twisting away. “Quit worrying…she won’t do nothing without my say-so. I’ve got it under control.”
At that moment Cameryn felt something click in her head. She won’t do nothing without my say-so. Maybe if she took back the power in her life again, people would stop looking at her like the victim she was more conclusively becoming every minute. And she knew exactly what she had to do.
She looked at the door, her nerves tingling. Throwing a quick glance in the sheriff’s direction, she backed to the dog door and dropped to her knees again, this time pushing fast, scraping her vertebrae against the metal frame with so much force she knew she would have a bruise down her backbone. She didn’t care. Once inside, she rocked back on her knees, exhilarated as she steadied the swinging flap with her hand. For the first time in a long while she’d done something on her own and the independence was electrifying.
It was dim inside. As Cameryn unfolded herself, she brushed off the front of her jeans, taking a moment to allow her eyes to adjust. The kitchen countertops were piled with plates and paper cups. A coffee pot, so stained the white plastic had turned to sepia, tipped drunkenly on a broken base. Although she’d never been inside the house, Cameryn had waited on Leather Ed many times at the Grand, and the interior of the home was exactly what she expected. A mess.
She drew in a breath and tried not to taste the stench of death that almost overpowered her. So far, Jacobs hadn’t sensed her absence, which would give her time to open the door in triumph. It is better to beg forgiveness than ask permission was a phrase her friend Lyric had taught her. But when she reached her hand to unlock the deadbolt she realized there was nothing to turn. The face of the brass deadbolt was smooth and flat; a keyhole yawned where the knob should have been. Staring, she tried to compute the dichotomy. How could a bolt need two keys? The outside of a lock demanded a key, but the inside lock should require only a turn of a handle. This side of the deadbolt was blank.
“Cammie!” She heard the sheriff curse and the heavy stomp of his boots on the porch. He pounded the door so hard it sounded like a sonic boom. “Are you in there?”
“Yes,” she called back. “I told you I could fit.”
Swearing, and then, “Come out of there right now—that’s an order!”
Cameryn ignored this. “I was going to unlock the door but there’s just a keyhole on this side,” she cried, loud enough for him to hear. “I don’t get it.”
“That’s because Leather Ed was paranoid. He used double key deadbolts to make sure nobody could break into his house. You have to have the key to get out.”
“So where is it?”
A pause, and then, “Where’s what?”
“The key.”
“I—he—Leather Ed kept them on his self.” Smacking the door again, he cried, “Okay, you’ve proved your point, you’re a very resourceful and independent girl—”
“Woman,” Cameryn said. She bit the edge of her lip.
“Woman. Now come out of there.”
“No.”
She said it so softly she knew he couldn’t hear her through the door. Doing something on her own was critical in a way she couldn’t define. The protective bubble-wrap needed to be ripped away. As she formed a plan in her mind, Cameryn felt more like herself than she had in weeks. It seemed as though she were finally shaking off the fog of sleep. Her mind was humming again.
The sheriff pounded wood, his thumps coming as rapidly as blows from a jackhammer. “Get yourself back through that doggy door right now!”
Cameryn stood close to the door, her palm resting on the cool wood. “Listen, I’m going to find Leather Ed and get the keys. Then I’ll open the door. It’s the most logical thing to do. So just chill.”
“Cameryn Mahoney!” Jacobs roared, and Cameryn knew enough to jump back. The sheriff reached his arm through the dog door shoulder deep, cursing in frustration as his hand grabbed nothing but air. There was no way he could fit through the opening. He knew it, too.
Cameryn tuned out the pounding, concentrating instead on what she might find in the next room. Though the dim half-light she moved forward, the smell thickening with every step. Cupping her hand over her nose Cameryn walked into a room filled with trash, with only a tiny rabbit trail, a foot wide, winding between mounds of newspapers and old magazines.
So, Leather Ed, this is your living room. A recliner had been shoved against a battered sofa covered with an afghan made of yarn. Both were empty. The television had been left on but there was no sound. The weatherman pointed to different points on a map, his mouth moving silently as the light blinked against the walls.
Strange, she thought as she took in the disarray. What a weird, sad man. She remembered waiting on Leather Ed at the Grand right before Christmas, when she and the cook had surreptitiously watched Leather Ed muttering to himself. Cameryn had noticed the way the cowhide conformed to his body until they became a kind of shell. The smell of unwashed flesh engulfed him as his gray hair sprung from his head in a kind of tangled wire. Like everyone else her age, she’d steered clear of the man. Now, inhaling the distinctive odor that told her Leather Ed was most surely dead, she felt ashamed of herself. Maybe the town that overwhelmed you, just like it’s overwhelming me, she thought. Were you trying to escape us? But even as she thought it she knew it wasn’t true. He’d walked among them, but he’d been invisible. The town was trying to escape him.
She moved on.
The smell was more intense by the staircase. Blinking, she looked up into the dark that stretched above her. The stair creaked beneath her foot when she took a tentative step, her hand gliding on the wooden railing as she began her ascent.
Sheriff Jacobs’ cries were muted now and easier to ignore. From this distance the sheriff’s rapping sounded like a pencil tapping against a desk as she stepped into the upper hallway. And then there was another sound, a voice that made her chest tighten. It was louder than Sheriff Jacobs’. More urgent. Angrier.
“Cammie, it’s me, Justin. You’ve got to stop this right now! It’s not safe!”
She groaned. As protective as her father and Sheriff Jacobs had been, Justin, Silverton’s deputy, had been worse. Still, she was committed to her path. Let them yell. All would be forgiven when she got those keys.
A door was on her right, cracked open less than an inch. Cautious, she pushed against it. Hinges squeaked loudly as the door swung open and she registered a stench strong enough to taste. Pulling her shirt over her nose she breathed through the cotton, grateful for this barest protection.
It took a moment for her eyes to adjust. Shadows seem to float against the wall like underwater creatures. Through the murky light she strained to see. Her fingers found the switch plate and she flipped it on. And there, propped in a chair by the bed, was the bloated corpse of Leather Ed, a book clutched in his hands. Body fluid had seeped onto the pages, covering the lines of print in an eerie watercolor. His feet, still encased in worn boots, were planted on the floor while his leathers, distended from decomposition, shone in the light. But it was his face that made Cameryn’s mind freeze. Every bit of skin was gone from his eyes down to his neck. His teeth, white and gleaming, grinned at her from a stripped skull. His jawbone had been wiped clean.
She could feel the horrified expression on her face as the room began to wobble at the edges of her periphery. Forcing her breathing to slow, Cameryn tried to make herself think rationally.
The German shepherd must have gotten to the corpse. His dog did this. From her forensic studies she knew animals could consume their masters after death. You’ve still got to get the keys. Keep going, she commanded as she moved closer to the body.
She wouldn’t have noticed the piece of paper folded neatly on the end table next to the body but for her name. The word ‘Cameryn’ had been printed in beautiful precision.
She reached out and grabbed the parchment, written in a perfect cursive hand.
To Cameryn, my anam cara,
I will love you until your dying breath. Please believe that I will find you, my Angel of Death. We are bound by cords you cannot break. Two worlds, intersecting separate pieces that the fates will never break apart. Trust that I will be with you soon.
In eternal adoration,
Kyle O’Neil.